Burnt Babies

True Colors

It’s amazing how something can begin so beautifully

Just to turn ugly over time

Maybe it was ugly all along

Recluse

I’m a recluse. I’m a freak. Let me tell you why.

Everywhere I go that I actually attempt to communicate with people is a complete and total waste of time. I put on a fake smile, say some nice or clever things, and wait until the opportunity comes that I can get as far away from people as possible. People don’t like me unless they need something. There is absolutely no substance to people anymore, so why go around them if I don’t have to? There is absolutely no attempt on their part to have an intelligent conversation. They would rather riddle me with useless babble about who they’ve slept with, who they would sleep with, who so and so slept with, who they want to sleep with, what parties they’ve been to, what parties they are going to go to, what drugs they’ve done, what drugs they want to do, etc., etc. I mean, it’s real deep and thought-provoking conversation. Yes, I’m being sarcastic. These are the things that make me stay at my house. Once there are actually people who want to have real conversations about real things, I’ll start going out again. If they want to mix some humorous bullshit in with the substantial conversation, I’ll happily oblige them with some funny haha of my own.

To Hold You

All I wanted to do was hold you

Now you don’t want me to ever again

Dead Town

Lonely

How do I have so many friends, but I’m the loneliest I’ve ever been?

Places

Here is a list of States I’ve been to:

Ohio, Kentucky, Pennsylvania, West Virginia, Maryland, South Carolina, North Carolina, Illinois, Missouri, Iowa, Nebraska, North Dakota, South Dakota, Indiana, Tennessee, Wyoming, California, Arizona, Washington, Alaska, Utah, Nevada, Idaho, Minnesota, Wisconsin, Oklahoma, New Mexico, Florida, Colorado, Montana, Georgia, Kansas, Virginia, and Arkansas. I’ve also been to Guam, but it’s an annexation.

Here is a list of Canadian Provinces I’ve been to:

Alberta, British Columbia, Yukon Territory, and the Northwest Territories.

Here is a list of countries I’ve been to:

Mexico, Canada, Jamaica, Japan, Korea, Singapore, Germany, Belgium, Luxembourg, France, and the Netherlands

I’ve flown enough to circumnavigate the globe 2 1/2 times. I’ve driven throughout North America enough to circumnavigate the globe 1 1/2 times. You would think that seeing all of this, and travelling all that way that I would be ready to settle down. The fact is there is a huge world out there for us to see. It’s all ours to enjoy.

Where Is Home?

Is home where I rest?

Is home where I eat?

Is home just a place where I keep my things?

What the hell am I doing here?

Is home where I feel at ease?

Is home where I find friendly faces?

Is home where my heart is?

What the hell am I doing here?

I have no home.

I have no comfort.

I have no place in the world.

What the hell am I doing here?

Mundane History

People, places, and things. That is what it all boils down to. Everything, everyone, and everywhere have a story. Most of them are left to speculation, but the story is there. Every historical figure, event, and place has stories that no one will ever know about. Certain things may have happened to lead up to whatever it is that caused whatever historical event that happened. This is the aspect of history that intrigues me the most.

People: There is a sequence of events that can lead up to an action that may change lives forever. This is history. For example, a man who has been emotionally distressed and unstable has been contemplating taking the lives of people that he considers enemies. In his mind, these people are out to get him, and he is convinced that he has to kill them. The little angel in him tries to change his mind that he must reconsider. So, he decides to go home and spend time with his significant other in order to try to appreciate his own life and whether or not it’s worth throwing away by taking the lives of his supposed enemies. When the man arrives home, he finds his significant other packing their belongings and getting ready to walk out of his life. This action convinces him that he must press on with his plans. The rest is history.

Places: An Army training base on the edge of a booming factory town trains around 15,000 troops a year by the end of World War I. This particular factory town is known to railroad workers and soldiers for its reputation of having the best seedy bars and for the whores that turn their tricks in the alleys behind these seedy bars. The railroad workers and the soldiers are the best customers. A soldier pays a whore for her services. The whore has what she believes is a cold, but nevertheless, she is dedicated to her job. After the soldier finishes, he heads off to base to sleep off the drunk that he has been on for the last two days. After he leaves, a railroad worker is her next customer. The next day, both of these fine gentlemen wake up feeling a little under the weather. They blow it off as a common cold and go about their business. The day after that, the cold is more severe for both men, and their comrades are feeling under the weather as well. Next thing you know, people are dying left and right. The cold was the Spanish flu. It ends up killing between 50 to 100 million people. This friends, is history sprouted from the mundane.

Things: A dollar bill that was put into circulation in 1973 is on the wall of a car wash in a frame. It was the first dollar the station ever earned in 1998 when it opened up. In 1973, it was paid out to a truck driver in his weekly earnings. He has had a long week, and he decides to let his hair down and have some fun by going to a local gentlemen’s club. The trucker gives this particular dollar to a classy dancer at this establishment. After her dance is over, she goes back to the dressing room, rolls the dollar bill up, and does a rail of cocaine. Once her shift is up, she buys a pack of cigarettes at a gas station on her way home. The gas station is held up later that night, and the dollar ends up in the pocket of the armed robber. From the armed robber, this particular dollar (along with many other bills) is paid to a local drug dealer for a balloon of heroin. The drug dealer spends it the next day at a dining establishment. It is then paid out in change to another patron at the eatery. From the patrons’ wallet, it ends up in the collection pan at his church. This dollar, a thing, spends 25 years travelling all over the place. It’s seen its share of crime, kindness, and thousands of other transactions before ending up on the wall of the car wash. That dollar is a mundane piece of history with a thousand stories under its belt.

Anything and everything has a story. That is what interests me. I’m not saying that I look at everything in this manner, but certain items, people, and places catch my attention. This ends up leading to other things I take interest in while learning about the things that caught my eye in the first place. So on, and so on. Ancient and modern historical places intrigue me because of the amount of history and stories that they possess along with what may lie ahead for them. The known facts about these places are amazing, but the devil is in the details. The details of everything and the stories they have is what intrigues me the most. People, places, and things can change the world. The details are what could sway everything in one direction or the other. One back story. That is history. Stay thirsty my friends.

Misery Loves Company

It’s true that misery loves company. I’m tired of making people miserable. I like making people laugh and happy. Granted, I see things in a very negative and skeptical way, but I used to try to make people happy because of the way I see things. Hoping that if they see things the way I do, at least I could provide a little comfort and comic relief. So, no more misery. No more petty anger. No more vindictiveness. I’m finished with it. One thing is for certain, with everyday that goes by, life slips away, and people leave. I don’t want people to loathe the thought of me when I’m gone. I want them to smile. So, I’m going to make people smile. Stay thirsty my friends.